Longings

Yeah! I have done it! As I stand there at one of the peaks in this difficult mountain range like a victorious warrior, soaking in the morning sunlight, basking in glorious afterglow of being successful at scaling heights, braving the tortuous terrain, memories of not so distant past came in torrents of vivid imagery.

The final and most punishing leg of the trek, the journey, the rigorous practice; in group and solo, toils and tears. Oh man! One hell of a bumpy ride; exhilarating and fulfilling.

It all started a year back. I was probably at the nadir of my fitness level; not giving a damn to anything healthy, be it food or lifestyle, yet boastful of my physical prowess or the lack of it to be precise.

In one such streak of going overboard, I said 'yes' to an online group of trekkers to go on a short and not so tough adventure trip.

I turned up on the decided date at the pickup spot; of course without any practice whatsoever worth mentioning, and so began my first ever trekking trip.

The team was comprised of young and old alike, an enthusiastic lot. Needless to say, I matched their level in talking it up. But, when it came to actually living up to my tall talk, I was an absolute disaster.

Huffing and puffing, panting and gasping for breath, I barely managed one third of the supposed to be cakewalk of a trek.

It was indeed so for rest of the group, but, for me it was a mountain, what for others was just a molehill. I was almost carried by my group mates to the final spot and back to where we started.

My physical and mental state took a severe beating, rendering me immobile for several weeks. I caged myself in my room, barely eating, hardly talking.

I may have totally messed up my first trek, but, I earned a new family of adventurists, energetic, supportive and full of life.

They talked me out of my depressing room and helped me follow a healthy regime. Dilly dallying initially, I started in right earnest after a month or so of that forgettable debacle.

The right kind of food and exercises did wonders in a short span of time and there was no stopping thereafter. The endless running, squats, burpees, mountain climbers, crunches, weight exercises and last but not the least, careful eating shaped me up slowly but surely. And, then came the invitation to join my team, for a real trek this time.

I immediately said 'yes' like before, but, unlike last time my body too was up for the challenge. And here we are at the peak. Great feeling! Words of exclamations, congratulations, and clicking amazing pictures followed.

I am now standing at a spot alone, looking at morning sun, thanking everyone and the universe for the fairy tales sort of a year gone by. But, a strange feeling slowly came up in my mind.

Here I am at one of the peaks, but, the euphoria seem to be already on the wane. I see the taller peaks in front of me and I need to scale them to lift my spirits up again.

What is it that I am going for after all? What if I feel the same after climbing these peaks? Probably the Everest then. But, after Everest what?

My mind was muddled and I was trying to find answers that could clear up the confusion. I would need to experience something more sublime to illuminate my inner world, something like this morning sun that brightens up this lovely world of ours.

A silent prayer came to my mind urging the mysterious forces of this cosmos to guide me in the right path.

My next journey would be in the uncharted paths of my inner worlds. Only time will tell whether I discover angels or demons in it.

It's going to be one hell of a marvellous journey for sure.