As our father turned 75 he began to be troubled by dementia. He had problems in dealing with time and space.
The once formidable, mentally, physically sharp, dapper man was now an absent minded, clumsy man. He wanted so hard to do the right thing, be thoughtful and be his usual considerate self, but age and health were not on his side.
His daily routine began with a visit to the Nanak Darbar Gurdwara, where he offered his prayers of gratitude and listened to hymns. Then he would return home for breakfast but only after visiting the market get himself and his assistant Sukesh a drink of fresh sugarcane juice.
It was a calm and wonderful time where I chatted and engaged with him as best as possible. Sometimes I just basked in father's presence with so much love flowing without anything needed to be said.
One day he misjudged his movements and dropped a plate full of food onto the floor. The resulting big ugly mess and upset and confused father and he apologised profusely. I was saddened to see the regression of a tiger of a man to a confused and timid kitten.
Instinctively, I stood up and simply hugged him and said "I love you Papa ji"
It was like time stood still, as we father and son embraced one another, sharing a true moment of pure love. Just overflowing with emotion, and tears, for both of us it was a feeling of love and tenderness like none other.
I realised that, 'The elderly need so little, but they need that little so much'.
This was a profound experience for me. Though I got a lot of of love from my father, it was significantly less than that the other siblings got. It's so strange this human trait, we are never happy with what we receive, but become decidedly unhappy with what others receive.
Those who love, give so much of themselves and so freely that we seldom realise its value until they are no more with us.
The word 'Anmol' (meaningful 'invaluable' in Sanskrit) comes to mind. 'Anmol' can mean either of no value or of immense value. On that day, when we embraced, and I uttered those simple but words 'I love you, Papa ji' I had some realisation of the priceless value of gratitude, love and care.
